HUMANITY AND GENDER In
January 2006 I had the privilege of attending the Feminenza conference
‘Humanity and Gender,’ supported by UNESCO and held at the United
Nations compound in Nairobi, Kenya. There were over 200 delegates
attending, consisting of NGO (non government organization)
representatives, teachers, activists, social workers, journalists from
Kenya, Burundi, Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo, as well as
50 Feminenza members and supporters—men and ladies—who came to help and
witness this new venture. It
all began in 2005 when Marion Verweij in Holland and Saija
Toth from Sweden approached Mary Noble, co-founder and CEO of
Feminenza, suggesting that it would be a good idea for Feminenza to
visit Kenya. In her research for her book ‘Beacons of Hope’ Marion had
made contact and befriended two Kenyan ladies, Millicent and Lucy, who
thought that Feminenza should visit their country, which badly needs
the influence that helps heal relationships and promotes understanding
between men and women. She had also interviewed Agnes Pareyio, founder
of the Tasaru Girls Rescue Center who later became one of the keynote
speakers at the conference. Saija on the other hand had been to Kenya
with her husband and thought it would be an excellent place for a
conference. And
so, with these two suggestions coming at Mary independently at the same
time, the three of them set out to visit Kenya, the first of three
consequent trips prior to the conference itself. On their first visit,
Mary, Marion and Saija met many remarkable people, including Redempta
who is a travel agent and active member of the Soroptomists, an
international women’s organization. She almost immediately signed up to
become the first Feminenza member in Kenya, recognizing the special
feeling that made her think that this is what she was meant to be and
do. There were other women who wanted to join Feminenza as well, one of
whom declared that Feminenza had come to Kenya because she had been
summoning it, as she was looking for meaning and fulfillment in her
life. Redempta played an important part during the conference, weaving
together some of the plenary sessions and panel discussions. A lady of
rare intelligence and wit, she is the Founder Member of Feminenza in
Kenya and no doubt will be an important influence in its continued
arising. In
the course of the three visits in 2005, Mary, accompanied by Saija,
Marion and Vera de Wit on the third visit, met a variety of people who
were working to improve the situation in their country. During her
search for people in Kenya who would be interested in the work of
Feminenza, Marion made contact with Reverend Emmanuel Muamba,
coordinator of UNESCO PEER Culture of Peace Network for the Great Lakes
countries and International Chairman for GRAPEDECO International (Great
People for Community Development International). Through both roles he
has contact with around 500 NGOs; he is also chairman of 5,000
Congolese refugees in Kenya as well as chairman and voluntary teacher
at UNILAC University in Nairobi. When
the three ladies met Emmanuel, something happened between them and
during their very first conversation, both sides knew that they shared
a powerful vision for Africa, the world and the future. “Why don’t you
hold the conference at the UN?” Emmanuel asked when he heard of their
plans, and he invited them to the UN compound in Nairobi to view the
facility. The first conference room they saw could hold around 100
people and all the facilities were excellent. And so the months of
preparation and fund raising began with special events held in Leiden
and Berlin (each respectively attended by the Kenya ambassadors to
Holland and Germany), London, Copenhagen and New York. It took over
four months to put the plan together, invite the delegates, work out
who would be invited as keynote speakers and workshop facilitators,
collect all the biographies and write the overview as well as the press
releases and schedules, lists of participants, and organize
transportation and accommodation for all the helpers traveling from
abroad. When all was ready, it turned out that over 200 delegates had
registered, and so luckily a larger conference room was allocated, so
everyone could be accommodated. The
conference brought people together who are dedicated to the idea of
promoting a new understanding of the relationship between gender and
humanity. It created an ecology within which for four days the
delegates could exchange ideas, hear about the many experiences of
people working in the field, join workshops on subjects pertaining to
the development of men and women and the various ages of life.
There were many ideas and technologies, some of which, according to
reports and evaluations that were submitted to the organizers on the
last day, were life changing. For example, two people who attended a
workshop about grief, one of whom had lost his wife and the other was
grieving after his father, said that knowing what grief is and
understanding the mechanics that cause the feeling of loss, has made a
huge difference in their life. Others
were surprised and delighted to meet people who were perhaps on a
similar crusade or struggling with the same issues (for example, the
problems of early forced marriages, female circumcision, AIDS and HIV,
poverty, hunger, violence against women)—so in the special ecology
provided by Feminenza new friendships were made, networks established,
ideas exchanged and visions shared. It was an inspiring exchange and
mart where Feminenza was seen to be the guiding light and we received
many invitations to return, to visit other countries, to help reconcile
the old and the new. All this was made possible by a team effort of 50
people who were there and many more who helped raise the $100,000 that
made it all possible. The
fourth day of the conference was dedicated to the essence of
forgiveness— forgiveness between men and women, between nations,
neighbors, tribes and above all, forgiveness of self. During a ceremony
dedicated to forgiveness Nick Were from MMAK (Movement of Men Against
AIDS in Kenya) invited all the men in the room to swear, with hand on
heart, that they would support the women and stand against violence
against women, wherever and whenever they encounter it, so help them
God. It was a very moving moment for us to witness. We
met so many remarkable men and women, it is impossible to mention them
all. So many agents of change who want to see women protected from FGM
(female genital mutilation) and early forced marriages, like
Christopher Murray who volunteers his services as manager of the Tasaru
Girls Rescue Center, founded by Agnes Pareyio, who has created a
sanctuary for young girls running away from home to escape FGM and
early marriages. The
young group YEKA (Youth Empowerment Kenya Association) contributed
songs and skits daily, adding to the variety and versatility of
expression displayed at the conference. So many small miracles
occurred. Pauline Pescini from New Zealand brought with her a series of
very special prayers, which were sent to her by the spiritual
‘teachers’ teacher’ of Maori tribal tradition. These prayers have been
carefully preserved and guarded for generations, and they are special
ceremonial prayers for Maori women. At the conference they were gifted,
along with a handful of Maori sacred stones, collected by Pauline, to
the women of Kenya, represented by members of some of the tribes of
Kenya, Burundi, Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo. There were
many more special moments of singing and dancing and meeting new
friends. On the third day there was a party with two bands playing
continuously and we learned to dance to some very energetic African
rhythms. But
best of all, relationships we have established with the women and men
of Kenya are strengthening every day. More than a dozen women have now
signed up to join the two already established Feminenza members in
Kenya to form a new staging post of this international women’s network
and very soon they will be embarking on a journey of development and
discovery together.
